Language

2). Do you agree that men and women use language differently?  In what areas?  Discuss this in detail. 


I do agree that men and women use language differently, however not in the same way the book describes. The book talks about women and men growing up in different cultures and its effect on language. While I believe this to be true, I feel that there has been a change in our current culture. I have noticed that some men are actually more communicative than I am. This could be because I am also foreign... In my culture women internalize things and do not necessarily ask too many questions. Unfortunately I grew up like this and it was difficult to actually say what was on my mind. I feel that there is a closing gap in terms of our differences in communication. My boyfriend was bothered by the fact that I didn't always say what was bothering me or what I was thinking in general. It was odd to me to date someone that was actually more open to communication than I was. While I feel this has changed, I don't think the other ways men and women use language will. My boyfriend loves watching 'Cops' and goes on long rants about how all of the ones arrested should plead the fifth. While these are his external thoughts during the show I cant help but think of other aspects such as why that person would lead a life that would result in their crimes... It truly is interesting how the minds work!

Concept- Symbols!

Language is symbolic and I have always believed this to be true. We use symbols in some way when we talk even if we don’t directly refer to them. During conversations we picture the things that we are talking about. Symbols are powerful since we don’t all see the same symbol when we speak to one another. If I am talking about a dog then my friend will picture their own idea of what a dog looks like. It could be entirely different than what I am thinking of, but the basic idea that it’s a dog will still stick. It is important that we are descriptive in our conversations because of the fact that language is symbolic. It is easy for miscommunication to occur when you are vague in your descriptions. I have found this to be important when writing the grocery list for my boyfriend. I might want a specific kind of beef, but if I just write ‘meat’ he might come back with a New York steak when I wanted sirloin.

Judgements

1). Is it possible to perceive others without in some way judging or categorizing them?  If so, how?  If not, how can we make the judgments we do make more fair?

I have thought about this for the past decade... It feels impossible to perceive others without making some kind of judgment. I think we can try to attain communication without judgment by listening to what others say before we make our assumptions. I have tried to do this for the past few years and have found that it is possible to some extent. I will never be able to take initial impressions away, but I am more able to reserve my judgments until I actually get to know someone or listen to an argument. Regardless of when I make them, judgments will always be there. I don’t really know if it is possible for others to never make judgments about others, but I know that it is something I will always find to be a challenge. The only way to make it seem less offensive is to at least reserve those judgments until you actually listen to an argument or get to know a person.

 

#2

I would have to say that Anderson Cooper is a good speaker. He seems to have all three, but credibility and attractiveness as his main strengths. He does have power when I come to think of it, in my opinion he was one of the last good journalists. I remember reading about an incident on his talk show. Some may have said that he sold out by having a talk show, but he still kept his integrity. A woman came on the show once known as ‘the human barbie’ and she talked about giving her young daughter plastic surgery coupons. Anderson Cooper was so disgusted that he kicked her off the show. This really made me think that he will always keep his integrity and I still feel like I can trust what he says. He built ethos through credibility; by kicking that woman off the show he maintained his credible status. It seems odd to say, but he would rather have an honest discussion with someone rather than someone just looking for publicity.

#1 Influence... and not!

I don’t really watch a lot of speakers. I tend to read more speeches than actually listen to them. However, I guess in a way I was influenced by a speaker. I have never done any drugs in my life… This is mainly because I never saw a point to them and they also had speakers in junior high and high school advocating against their use. There was a man that came to my junior high school who used to do drugs heavily. It is one thing to see ‘The Faces of Meth’ website and another to actually hear someone’s story about how they ruined their life. It had a huge impact on me and it was mainly because of the passion the man had behind his story. He was genuinely saddened by his past and was very strongly against anyone else turning out like him. You would never think just by looking that this man would be a good speaker, but you could tell after listening to him that he had done it many times before. The WORST speaker I have ever heard was at a motivational seminar. It was called a motivational seminar, but in the end it was just a massive sales pitch by several people. One of the men was talking about investments and how you should purchase homes and sell them right away. He kept telling the audience to never have anything in their name. The reason he was so awful is because he didn’t practice what he preached. He let it slip that he had several cars to his name and several homes. His credibility was completely out the window…

Pragmatic Model

2). Consider the pragmatic perspective.  Does it make sense to think of communication as patterned interaction?  How is communication like a game?  How is it different from a game?

I have seen many different models of communication. It seems that every class seems to use a different one; the joy of this class is you get to see so many different ones. The idea of communication as a game isn't a new one to me. The terms used remind me of soccer sometimes. You go back and forth several times, an unexpected environment can create different results, a physical weakness can also distract you, there is always some sort of interference, and you rely on clues/mistakes from your opponent to win the game. It does seem to be patterned, but there are too many variables in actual communication to be exactly like a game. Most games have a clear winner and loser. While there is sometimes a tie in games communication is not limited to these outcomes. There are times when no one can win an argument and you can also lose relationships in communication. Games tend to keep opponents regardless of how much they dislike each other. Your friend may never call you back if you argued with them to a point of insulting them.

Concept

Intentionality. I have never seen it as a word like that, but I think it’s a very important concept. There are many errors in communication that occur because someone’s body language contradicted what they were saying. It is vital how we interpret things because not all actions are intentional. I squint my eyes all the time because I wear contacts; I also blink more because I wear contacts. This is normal for me, but someone else might think otherwise. Someone else might interpret it as me looking at them in a questionable way or that I am nervous for some reason. It made me laugh reading this because I was watching Sherlock Holmes the week before this chapter reading. We all do things subconsciously that may be indicators of our personality. I was reminded of the scene with Watson and his fiancé… He was going on about the things she was wearing and not wearing. All these things told him a little bit about who she was. The fact that he could tell the jewelry was borrowed because of the ink mark on her ear… If only we could all interpret as deep as Mr. Holmes can, but then again we may not have many friends if we all did that.